a pretty misunderstanding

i though u have fall asleep
cause it really sound so

i though u fall asleep until u did not hear i talked with you
so i hang the call

but the though is FALSE

now everything seem like my FAULT

i have to bear it..

who can understand the sadness in my heart?
who know much tears i have drop?

no one..

uncountable

原来到最后
错的还是我

为什么
每次都是这样！
我不明白！！！

我这样也是错吗？？？？

actually there are something hidden from my sound heart

i felt like i am just a joker

kept all the sadness and tiredness behind the makeup

put a thick smiling, happy makeup on the face

i am really tired of working

i knew my body immune system is low battery

i might fall sick at anytime

but i can not let it happen cause there are a lot of things i need to handle

i need to stand still and hold on tough for the coming big issues

next week will be a super busy week for me

i myself will need to take care 8 children from different standard by myself

so i think next week, i will have no time for you

even right now i also got no time to concentrate on my phone

most of times are spending on the kids

this is my career, i can not be irresponsible

so i need to take care of them and make sure they are learning

as they will be my achievement

i am so sorry for being no time for you

i don't want it to happen too

but right now i am young

i have the stamina and ability to stay till late and work hard

just to earn money for a better future

you and i know what should we do to achieve our future

so i am just working hard on it

sometimes after finished my 10 hours worked

i am exhausted

my mentally need a rest

my physically need to keep fresh so no one will worry

but no matter how as u said

'even iron will rotten, need to polish'

when i am tired, all i need is caring and positive statement

words that can give me motivation to move on

continued it..

not words that will make me upset and headache

this is because in front of u

i don't wanna be a joker

but a girl with the real original face

a person that i can rely on
always support me..
beside me...

February is here..
This is the month i will start to be busy..
This is the month i am taking personal student
This is the beginning of my challenge
This is the time for me to test myself ability